i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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