is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
