my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize