she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
