Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
vagina is talking i cant
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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