So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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