She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
