so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
