Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
