So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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