girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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