exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I've blown a few things in my day
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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