the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Someone came in the potted fern
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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