U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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