all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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