i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
My vagina is officially offended.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
