How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
