my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
