I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
