he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
