I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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