Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
We were destined to go to rehab together
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Text me some of your sweat
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
