is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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