She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
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