You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
She told me I should be a condom model.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
