The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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