When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
