weddingsv make me drug and hornr
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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