ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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