She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
