i would punch a child for taco bell
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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