Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Randomize
