love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
