So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
