id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
