what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
