do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
he was CRYING into my vagina
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
