I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
