Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
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