Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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