If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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