Dual....:-)
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
