I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
