I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize