They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
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