i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I wish you could order shots online.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
