I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
