On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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