Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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