i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You have to summon your inner elephant
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I wear drunk well.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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